A Poem Inspired by Hawaii: The Romancing of Paradise

Ah!  The feel of sand beneath my toes, and the warmth of the air around me embracing me...when I wake every morning here in Hawaii, I pinch myself to see if this is real.  "God, really?"  I ask, "This is my home for now?"  Yes.  The answer is yes.  I live here.  There are struggles still, and life still happens, but I also have the reality of God's love for me caressing my eyes each day as I bike to work or walk to the beach.  Poetry helps to speak of the wonder I feel, but it still does not do justice to the depth of Christ's love for us, which He sculpts each day not only within our hearts, but also in the sights and senses around us...

The Romancing of Paradise

Blue, greens, whites, and yellows

greet my eyes with morning hellos.

Twinkling windows wink in my sight

as I lay my head down at night.

The rush of traffic my lullaby

and on my horizon, the limit’s the sky.

Morning warmth wraps me up tight,

holds me in the rays of light

as I feel the sun’s energy course through me.

I run past the swaying palm tree –

standing like a centurion –

the rows of trees my own giant guards in green neon.

After work, the rocking of waves the motion

that calms my emotion.

I sit on my board and watch the surf rolling in,

or just strike out in it for a swim.

This salt upon my tongue

tastes like the song the shells sung when I was young,

only now it’s my reality.

My backyard is truly the sea,

my landscape the palms and plumeria

reminding me, “Keep dreaming, I dare ya!”

The roar of the waves,

the smell of the tropical leis,

the feel of flying over water on my board,

All propels me to its Maker – my Lord.

He loves me enough to paint color across the sky

And kiss me with sun as on the sand I lie.

He graces my neck with flowers

and lets me view diamonds glittering across the ocean at all hours.

He loves me so to fill my senses

with sights and feelings that strip my defenses.

He took what seemed in my life like loose seems

And stitched them together in themes

to bring to reality my dreams –

all the bright color now coming forth – in pictures of this Island it streams.

Here I wake in paradise each day,

Listening for what my Love – Jesus – has to say…

His song the crash of the waters,

His dance over me the sway of the palm-fodders,

And His touch the heat on my skin

as the sun reaches me from the outside in.

Each day is Jesus’ love letter written in creation,

How can I not live in elation?

Thanking God each day for this chance

to dance in the reality of His nature’s romance!

© Krindee Joy, Dec. 2010.  Inspired by the beauty of the Hawaiian Islands, which speak

                                               to me of the beauty of my Creator God’s passionate love!

THE Jesus Bug

SO!  I'm sick.  Really sick.  My throat is burning and I sound like a dying cow when I try to talk.  I had a fever last night and I'm just plain grumpy.  I'm a horrible sicky, okay.  PLUS, I've been training since summer for the marathon which is TOMORROW, at 5am no less.  HELP ME!  I will be honest, I cried this morning because I was so frusterated AND I threw some clothes around the room.  Arrrr... (ya, most of you who know me probably can't picture me doing this...toldya I get grumpy sometimes, i.e. when I'm sick....did I mention I'm sick??????)  But now I have to laugh, because Jesus cracks me up.  When I was reading my Bible, he totally convicted me of my attitude and reminded me that even a sickness can be redeemed by Him!  Then, this poem came out.  It's sort of corny and what-not, but I thought the parallell was interesting.  What if we ALL spread the infection of Jesus' blood (i.e His grace and forgiveness) to everyone??? Our world would be taken over with a pandemic of love!  I think we have to allow Jesus to take over all the other things within our body  that aren't of Him so we become purely the DNA of Holiness.  AND, it's nothing WE do, it's what His blood does inside of us!  Now THAT'S an infection I wouldn't mind having!  :)  :)  :)

THE Jesus Bug

This burn in my throat

Is like the fire in my soul

The pain on my heart is wrote

And in my body takes a toll

Like a fever, I have visions

Of what isn’t real

But what I hope from these missions

Sometimes I can’t help spewing what I feel

The truth kept in grows too heavy

And demands release

To out-flood like a broken levy

Only this water brings life to the deceased

Not death to the living

The more I’m silent the more my symptoms increase

Until I must start giving

I’m infected with this Jesus bug

That burns hot through me

To get out of my room where I’m safe and snug

And venture to the cold world where the hurting be

The symptoms demand I spread love everywhere

And cough forth words of life

It’s an infection I must share

For it overtakes all other pain and strife

And brings every cell within

To shake alive fully

As it kills the virus of sin

Replacing it all with blood so Holy.

© Krindee Joy, Dec. 2010

Discouraging Discouragement

LICENSED to OVERCOME DISCOURAGMENT

                Feeling ‘No’ but Choosing ‘Yes’

I feel lost.

The heart and brain feel disconnected.

My heart wants to reach out, my mind says, “It’s impossible.”

I’ve tried.

I’ve failed…?

Or have I? 

Yes, I’ve tried so hard, and it seems all I’ve tried has been for naught.  My words fall on deaf ears; my extended hand slapped down; my offered heart crushed.  I’ve strove and sought to be and do all, only to find I seem to be nothing and have nothing to offer.

I feel lost.  I feel disjointed.  I feel like a failure.

Why do I feel this way?  Because I’m trying for the impossible – I’m believing for the impossible.  Sometimes there comes a point when I’m waiting for my status-quo to change, or waiting to see a miracle in another’s life, when I stand facing this immensely massive barrier, complete with glinting, sharp spikes at the top.  My neck spazes as I crane to observe the feat.  It’s like the stinkin’ Great Wall of China!  I think, “This is ridiculous, God!  There’s no way!”

“DO NOT SAY ‘NO’ TO WHAT I SAY ‘YES’ TO!”

“Huh?”  I want to ignore this sentence pounding in my head and beating loud on the hardness of my heart, but it comes again.

“DO NOT SAY ‘NO’ TO WHAT I SAY ‘YES’ TO!”

“God, what does this mean?” I question.  The response is still imploding my world. 

“I have called all things possible, and for you to declare something too vast, too overwhelming, or too big or lost for me to overcome is to debase my Godhood.”

Ouch!  I was giving into my emotions over the Holy Spirit’s power, and my heart was speaking continued death over situations which were already “dead” but which God says He wants to revive.  I chose to rest in the shadow of the Great Wall of discouragement instead of the shadow of the Almighty’s wings (Psalm 91).  “God!  What are you saying?” I had to clarify.  “Are you saying anytime I give up on a situation, or anytime I believe something is too much or too big, that I’m devaluing you?”

Scripture verse after scripture verse came in response:

“Is anything too difficult for the LORD?” Genesis 18:14

“I am the LORD, the God of all mankind.  Is anything too difficult

 for me?” Jeremiah 32:27

“What is impossible with men is possible with God.” Luke 18:27

“With God all things are possible.” Matthew 19:26

When I lose these verses of truth, my heart and brain really do go in disconnect.  The Holy Spirit inside of me is saying, “Krinda!  You must believe in ME more than you believe in the world’s reality,” while my brain is saying, “Noooo way!  It didn’t work before, it’s been too long, this is impossible!”   I am lost when I go by my brain, because I am swallowed in the darkness that comes from doubts and confusion. 

You see, I’m believing that God brings miracles into my friend’s and family’s lives.  I’ve been praying for months that God restores my friends’ marriage – a situation that seems beyond repair.  I am believing that God brings relationships into my family that bring wholeness and not brokenness; I am believing that God breaks the spirit of self-doubt over myself; I am believing for revival in my workplace.  But, with all these things, I see no change.  When something does progress, it seems only to digress just as fast, or turn to false hope.  BUT (I say again) God speaks to these situations once more –“DO NOT SAY ‘NO’ TO WHAT I SAY ‘YES’ TO!”

I’ll be honest, sometimes I want to give up.  I want to say, “Well, it didn’t work!  I’m not seeing any change, so I’ll just keep it safe and not believe anymore,” because I feel like a failure when my prayers don’t “work.”  That’s the thing though…IT’S NOT ABOUT ME!  It’s about God!  It’s about choosing to say God is God, in every situation.  No matter what, I must choose to believe God is who He says He is.   It’s not about the outcome either, because my finite mind cannot understand the infinite purposes of God’s plan.

Feelings are just that, feelings.  It’s okay to have them, but it’s not okay to allow them to govern what we declare about WHO God is, or WHAT God can do.  That doesn’t mean I don’t feel discouraged sometimes, but if I revere God I must declare His greatness regardless.  HE IS UNCHANGING.

Our “Great Walls” are opportunities to Him who has a history of toppling gates and parting seas.  AND, when Jesus Christ is our God, He gives us the liscense to also overcome this world through Him. 

When you feel ‘NO WAY,’ choose ‘YES WAY,’ and be willing to stand on that no matter the outcome, because the outcome does not change the fact that “With God all things ARE possible.” 

In short, just say "YES" to Jesus Christ.  So simple, and yet, it is the main source to discouraging discouragement!  Christ is our license to live outside of the realm of feeling and in the realm of faith!

© Krinda Joy, December 2010

REAL...

Resurrecting Love

I LOVE love.

I serve a God who IS Love.

So, I cannot fully serve Him without embracing love…

But in a world that distorts the meaning of real love, I sometimes find myself running from loving others.  Real love, the God kind of love, can be scary because it hurts…but it hurts in a way that means your heart is fully feeling.  It’s feeling what God feels! The past month this relationship between love and fear keeps resurfacing in my life.  Not only did I recently write for a friend’s website regarding this, but each time I open my Bible or sit to write, it’s as if God keeps revealing this dichotomy to me:  love’s opposite is fear, not hate… 

                                                                                              Hate stems from fear… 

For example, the devil fears God and those following God, so he also hates them because he knows they can defeat him. He does not hate what he does not fear.  Before I continue, let me be clear that the fear I speak of here is not the healthy, respectful fear, but a fear which evokes emotionally and physically harmful reactions. 

I have noticed lately that the biggest deterrent to love is fear, and this fear masks in so many ways.  People are afraid of the other person, afraid of themselves, or just afraid of living and caring in general.  Sometimes I wonder, “If perfect love casts out all fear” (1 John 4:18), what are we, as a society, really operating in?  That thought in and of itself is scary to think about! 

We the Christians – who worship the God of Love who IS Love – half the time are so bound by fear and “what ifs” that we can’t cast our hearts out there.  If we truly understood, though, that our hearts belong to Jesus when we surrender out lives to Him, then we wouldn’t be afraid because we would trust where He leads our hearts and when He wants to open them up and use our hearts to reach someone else. 

It’s true, even in the care of Jesus, love and caring still HURTS at times!  Real love is sacrificial and our flesh doesn’t like to sacrifice.  If love must be patient, keep no record of wrongs, and if it always perseveres (1 Corinth. 13), we better believe that loving will lead to circumstances where it’s going to get hard and we’ll have to give up our personal comfort for the sake of serving another.  But, we cannot afford NOT loving because without it, the scriptures say we can’t possibly know God (1 John 4:7)!   .  How can we possibly love Him when we aren’t loving the “the least of these” (Matthew 25:40), for that’s how He says we serve Him on this earth?  When we run from the chance to love someone who might accept us in their moment of need, then discard our friendship, or when we run from the opportunity to embrace an unlovable or undesirable, then we run from God!

I say it again, if we are entrusting our hearts to God, we should not hesitate to LOVE.  Because, after all, it’s not our love, it’s HIS we’ll be giving.  And, if we are rejected or gossiped about because of it, they are persecuting and rejecting Him!  But, He never fails to love, and the best we can do is not fail to entrust ourselves to loving God and His creation with abandonment.

This agape love – the God-Love – is meant for everyone, and God extends it to everyone who accepts!  It is unconditional, unconventional, and unequivocal to anything else in this world!  To extend to people anything less than the love of our Savior, as imperfect of a vessel as we may be, is to reject God and what He wants to do in and through us. 

So, I ask again, why are we so afraid of love?  Sure, loving hurts.  Metaphorically speaking, sometimes it requires we nail our comfort to a cross and we spill our life out for another.  But, when we give a sacrifice of love for another, it always involves a resurrection of our hearts as we experience the glory of God working inside of us; at this point, the clothes of pain and sacrifice are discarded for the shining presence of the Holy Spirit within us.  For, by putting to death our selfish human instincts, we allow Him and His love to fill us up, and flow out of us in an ever-increasing measure.

We should not fear love when we understand it.  Love always leads LIFE!  It was Jesus’ LOVE that led to the cross, hence it was also His love that lead to His resurrection after that, a resurrection which gives us LIFE today!  True God-love, even when it’s trampled, rejected, despised and spat on by others, never leads to death in the end…but always resurrects real LIFE in our hearts because it releases Jesus to work inside and out! 

©Krinda Joy, Nov. 2010  

(Written with the hopes of resurrecting a church that chooses to love, not judge; one that

chooses to allow God to break their hearts for what breaks His, and embrace what/who He embraces).

A Poem of Pleading for those Purchased but Picking the Pit

PLEADING FOR MODERN SODOM AND GOMORRA

Written By: Krinda Joy, October 22^nd’10

“My heart on paper for those lost who refuse to

acknowledge they’re burning, bursting, blistering.”

Bleep. Bleep. BLEEP!

Profanity from their heart seeps,

bitterness and anger held for keeps.

Every chance to lose their senses

indulged while keeping a tally of their offenses.

Depravity applauded as freedom, but each hit builds more fences.

Trapped!  They put on the face of careless bravado,

But it’s all just a show.

When they’re clean they feel the low.

Trying to play it up, proudly declaring, “Ya, I’m a hoe.”

Or bragging they’re some pimp rollin’ in doe.

Continually running to the numbing because deep down they know…

Stop and they can feel their insides slowly heating –

hearts barely beating –

the pressure within so defeating.

The only way they know to make the inner void abate

is to fill it – with drink, drugs, sex – at a frantic rate.

So now they’re in this state –

burning their lives from the inside out

Like active volcanoes, ready to spout…

the bleeps of sulfur puffing from their mouth is a desperate shout.

And here in the midst of the lava I stand

with The Fire Extinguisher in my hand.

The smoke and ash of souls fluttering, at my feet they land.

I bend down and cup a handful of exploded life

As I cradle remains the grief is rife,

my own inner battle cutting like a knife –

compassion and helplessness at war.

I want to climb these fences and find the door

to their hearts, past the fire to the inner, oozing sore.

I want to offer The Extinguisher before another blows up,

“Jesus already defeated this hell you’re shooting in and guzzling from that cup,”

I offer; only to become the target of that heat waiting to erupt.

So here we are – fire and ice.

They keep gambling way life like the toss of a dice,

not realizing that the stakes are hotter than chili spice.

I’m trying to keep from melting in the midst of this furnace around me,

But droplets from my eyes is the fee

for caring and desiring to see them free.

Jesus!  I plead on their behalf and pray –

in these lives lost in a Sodom and Gomorra cycle, please use me today

to turn at least one from their trajectory for fire to the Living Water’s soothing way.

A Season of the Spirit

“Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.  See I am doing a new thing!  Now it springs up, do you not perceive it?  I am making a way in the desert and streams in the waste land.”  

~ Isaiah 43:18-9

I’ve been in Hawaii less than two weeks, yet it’s amazing how quickly God assimilates those following where He guides into the new season or place He brings them to.  As I was reading my Bible a few mornings ago, God began affirming to me – through the above scriptures – the things He’s laid on my heart since attending the church here, Grace Bible Church.  Although the following words specifically fall in line with the direction God seems to be leading Grace Bible Church, I believe these words also apply to the Church in America as a whole.  It’s time we step into new seasons ready and willing to leave former things behind, instead of grasping to every last remnant of the old season.

Friday night, September 17^th, at Youth Night I watched the young adults worship their Creator and wept.  It brought joy to my heart to see that sincere desire to please the heart of God; as we sung about chains being broken and coming before the throne of God, a sudden picture came into my head…

            A young adult knelt at the foot of the throne of God, their chains lying in front of them in a pool of blood – their own blood.  The young person held their bloodied hands up over their face as the individual wept…

            God impressed upon me that this was a picture of the stage many young people are getting stuck in.  For, when we come to Him with our junk, He breaks the chains off…they are gone.  Yet, this individual in the above picture chose to sit at the Throne of Grace still near those chains, dwelling there, in their own blood and condemnation.  The young person was continually shedding their own blood as a way of trying to make penance for past things which God has broken from their life.  The blood (penance and sacrifices) from our veins will not amount to His blood, which He wants to pour out to not only break away the chains, but wash them away as well.  There comes a point when we must implement the first part of the above verses from Isaiah and release theses chains – not dwelling on the past sins, but allowing the chains to be cast AWAY (note: this does not excuse us from bringing current sins/chains to God and letting Him take those away).  I challenge you, if you have been stuck on the former things and dwelling on the past, don’t keep those chains near you anymore and continue dragging them around into the presence of God.  If you truly have repented, then you are to let God replace the old with the new.    God is saying, “Child, it is time to come before my throne praising!  Not with a heart of the condemned, but one redeemed!”  Have you been redeemed?  Then come to the throne with that heart and don’t cover your face in shame, but lift your hands in rejoicing!

Now, another aspect of not dwelling in the past involves new seasons.  At Grace Bible Church’s young adults’ service on Sunday, we were praying before worship and one of our prayer focuses was “New Seasons.”  God impressed upon me to realize that God is doing new things now in His church.  Just like with the youth’s chains, God was pressing on my heart to intercede that we do not dwell on old hang-ups, past failures, nor past miracles/movements.  Instead, we are to SEE He is doing a new thing.  Not just look, but see because that involves spiritual eyes; for Isaiah 42:18 declares, “look you blind, see!”  Anyone can look, but eyes must be opened and perceptive to the new things God is doing to truly see.  Bobbie Houston, of Hillsong Church, has this to say about seasons in her book I’ll Have What She’s Having:

New seasons may merge gently into your experience, or they may arrive abruptly on your doorstep.  The key is in recognizing the season and having the capacity to allow each season its purpose.  Therefore, do not camp longer than you are supposed to, do not resent one season over another, do not confuse seasons, and definitely do not try to skip a season…”

A new season is coming to the Church of America – one of awareness and action.  Can you smell it, because I have at Grace Bible Church.  And, God is warning that if we do not pay attention, the new season will sneak up on us and we will miss the glory of the process, or perhaps begrudge not having what was in the former season.  Don’t miss the buds of newness which God is springing up in your life, and the church around you.

Finally, the last verse scripted above applies to the message spoken at Grace Bible Church that very same Sunday night.  Pastor articulated that often we go through times in the desert, and that, “on the path towards destiny, sometimes God will lead us through the desert.”  As this sermon reminded us, these times are times of learning and teaching.  Verse 19 of Isaiah also reminds us of this, and furthers the message in saying that these spots of God teaching and guiding us can actually cause the journey through the desert to be refreshing.  For, there are streams in the dry land where God provides for us.  This does not mean everything turns wonderful – we still must endure the heat and dryness all around – but our SOULS do not have to grow dry.  The Holy Spirit is the Living Water – which is something my brother Nathan has been speaking to me about.  And, if we are baptized in the Holy Spirit, this Living Water lives inside of us!  No matter where life takes us, even to the great spiritual-Sahara-desert, our stream and source of refreshment is there.  We can continually sip from it!  That time in the desert does not have to drain, but can be a time when learn to fully depend on the Holy Spirit for our source of fulfillment and LIFE!

In short, God says to Grace Bible and the rest of His church:

LEAVE THE CHAINS BEHIND, DON’T DRAGTHEM WITH YOU ON YOUR JOURNEY; LOOK AND SEE GOD SPRINGING UP LIFE IN THE DRYNESS AROUND YOU; AND, WALK TOWARDS THIS NEW SEASON, BEING LEAD BY THE STREAM OF LIVING WATER!

“For I will pour out water on the thirsty land,

And streams on the dry ground; I will

Pour out my Spirit…” Isaiah 44:3

Killing Religion

I’ve said it before, and I shall say it once more – I hate religion, and I usually don’t use that “H” word. 

Religion kills.

Religion cripples.

And, religion keeps the dead down and the lame immobile.

The saddest part about religion is that it’s sneaky.  The shackles, like snakes, slither through the cover of theology, church culture, and the pursuit of knowledge.  When we receive the bite of religion, and the slinking cords bind us, we are poisoned with immobility.  The mentality keeps our hands and feet from being effective because we become so inward focused.  Life suddenly becomes overgrown with the need to “be better” than others, prove ourselves to God, look and act right, or follow all the right rules so we are “holy.  Instead of moving forward in the Kingdome (by winning souls), we cycle in this constant of striving, guilt, and striving again to “make up” for lacking. This is the religion that kills when given power long enough; for, soon it causes this thing called Christianity to lose the Christ-centered focus we become enslaved to something other than Jesus Christ’s heart…

Theology, church culture, and the pursuit of knowledge in and of themselves are desirable.  We should all seek to become educated and involved, but when they replace the pursuit of Christ’s heart first, we open ourselves to religion’s sneak attack because everything becomes about ME and MY life. As we honestly seek out – then live out – the heart and passion of our Savior, it’s impossible to grow inward focused and solely rules oriented.  Jesus’ heart was for the people.

HE BROKE THE RULES FOR THE PEOPLE.

            Everywhere He went and everything He did focused on reaching and saving people.  He ministered on the Sabbath, spoke outside the church walls, conversed with races he wasn’t suppose to associate with, went against the law for the sake of a woman caught in adultery, ate with people still in sin…

ALL

   For the sake

               Of the PEOPLE in need of what He had to offer.

 If we are truly Jesus-people, then we lose the intense focus on MY calling, MY gifts, MY struggle, MY reputation, and understand that life is all about JESUS working through the “my” to reach the “other” people.  The only reason why we have a “my” in this life is for the “others.”  After all, Jesus didn’t come to this earth for the “my,” but for the entire world!

I’ll be the first to admit that getting caught in the cycle of religion is easy.  One of the main reasons, other than it being like the “sneaky snake” I spoke of earlier, is that often we can’t see we are being religious!  As previously mentioned, the religious’ spirit masks mostly in things which remain good disciplines for our life.  So, outwardly all appears commendable, but as the mindset rears its head, the fangs come out – not only hurting the freedom we’re meant to have through the cross, but hurting those around us.  To keep ourselves alert and our minds and hearts in check, let’s break down the practical differences between living as Jesus-People and Religion-Slaves.

~A Jesus person looks for the lost people and hunts for those in sin for the purpose of sharing hope with them (Luke 19:10); a person driven by religion huddles only

in the safe circle of church groups and does not seek outside of the church to bring in the lost.

~A person with Jesus’ heart reaches out in gentleness to those who are struggling and hurting, broken by this world and sin (including those already in the church) – realizing that NO ONE is righteous without the mercy of Christ (Matthew 9:12-3); a slave of religion sees the broken, fallen, and condemns them as “unclean,” and perhaps even unworthy of their company.

~A Jesus-heart seeks to serve not for the title, but as a way of getting close to those in need of a word from God and to attract others to God because they know that God is the one who grants them authority (Matthew 9:4-8); a religious person serves in order to be recognized by others and elevated to a higher position by the world’s authority.

~A Jesus-follower embraces those “weaker” spiritually and opens their arms to the less-educated (Mark 9:36-7); a religion-bound person looks down upon the more vulnerable and enjoys the feeling of being “elite.” 

The list extends on and on, and the difference between religion and a true Christian-Jesus-follower always goes back to one’s approach towards people.  After all, if we love the Lord our God with all our hearts, soul and mind, then we have to love what He loves too.  When it came to a choice between a doctrine/practice/rule or a person’s heart, Jesus cast aside it all for the sake of one man or woman in need!  He didn’t do things the old way.  He put to death religion (the sacrifices which people did in attempt to be holy) with His final death in order to bring eternal life to the hearts of people.  Are we willing to do the same?

Are we willing to bring someone with a “bad” rep to church and risk the association?

Are we willing to do serve when no one is watching or applauding?

Are we willing to cast aside every judgment and the way things are supposed to work in order to seek to reach the heart of one person?

Because, if we are ready to also put religion to death, suddenly we will find we are FREE and ALIVE because we are allowing Jesus’ resurrecting power to flow through us and breathe life to the dying and suffering around us every day.  Take a deep breath.  Ahhhhh…now go find people to breathe into.