Living Colors of Compassion

My heart beats hard, my eyes water, my fists clutch to my chest, my mouth utters a prayer, "AH! God..."

This is not pain.  It's something different.  It explodes inside me.

     This is compassion.

                 And, I don't know what to do with it.

                          But I know I MUST do SOMETHING or my insides will rip apart.

LIVING COMPASSION

Actually, my insides are more likely to become emulsified than to rip apart.  When we ignore the call of compassion, of sacrifice, of loving and giving to others over "self," something dies within us.  It's like coral - coral is a beautiful, colorful living species in the sea, the moves freely and gracefully with the ebb and flow of the tide.  BUT, when it is cut off from the life source, it hardens and dries out.  It cannot move, and it no longer is vibrant and alive.  Our heart, like the coral, must continually move with the flow of the Holy Spirit and stay connected to compassion, or we become hard and dried out with all the life and vibrance sucked out from us.  After all, our heart is supposed to be JESUS' heart for others, so when we ignore this beat - this implosion within to love and give to others - we ultimately ignore Jesus.  The book I'm reading right now paints a picture of what compassion in action can do in our lives:  it says that our lives  will "blaze" with evidence of Jesus all over our lives - yes, blaze with those vibrant colors alive and moving within our hears.   

"When we look out beyond ourselves, when our love for others pushes us beyond the comfortable, when we place our treasure in rebuilding lives, it is then that we find ourselves living among the clearest signs that God is at work in our lives...the evidence of love in action will be blazed all over our lives, transforming our neighborhoods and breathing hope into the atmosphere."                                           The Love Revolution, Meyer.

DO SOMETHING

We might know this, we might agree with this, but as I am, we may all be simply clutching our fists to our heart, fighting the tears of compassion expanding but without knowing WHAT THE HECK WE CAN DO to stop hunger, abuse, prostitution, slavery, poverty.  

Like most, I don't really know what I can do to stop the injustices and pains of this world:

       BUT I'VE ABSOLVED TO DO SOMETHING....

Something is better than nothing, and it will keep me rooted-alive in the ocean all around us that seeks to uproot us and pull us away from the Source of Life.  

COMPASSION IN ACTION

Here's where it gets practical.  If we pick just one of these actions to do a week, we begin to see our lives explode with so much color that it begins to reflect upon those around us.  Maybe these activities seem small, but better to let compassion works it's course, then to let it petrify our hearts by it's constant barrage of tears within, just longing to extend outwards to others.  

• Give food to a homeless individual, or simply stay and talk with him or her for awhile; let them tell their story, it will make them feel human again.
• Pick a charity that makes your heart beat a little faster and give just $20 to $50 dollars.  Even $10.  We all can skip going to the movies that month, and spend the $10 on feeding a child, stopping prostitution, or helping SI (self-injury) victims.
• Make TIME for someone hurting and lonely.  Listen, follow up, and really TRULY care.  Don't try to solve all their "problems," care and listen first.
• Play with a child!  I know this does not seem like compassion, but staying sensitive to little children keeps our hearts soft - after all, Jesus himself demonstrated this, "Let the little children come unto me."
• Volunteer - soup kitchens, Special Olympics, community centers...most run off of people responding to the call of compassion and volunteering.
• Mentor a youth.  With the divorce rate over 50%, you'll find most youth today are from homes that are broken, and they are also broken inside.  They need role models and people to LOVE them unconditionally.
• Talk about it!  Blog, write, speak to another about having compassion for others.  Stir it up within those around you.  Even if they've become like the hardened coral already, there is a little bit of life just longing to be stirred back up within most everyone.
• Cook for an elderly neighbor or offer to mow their lawn or help with whatever he or she needs.
• Donate to canned food drives, etc.  There's always something going on in your area to raise supplies or food.  
• Check out these websites:  http://www.samaritanspurse.org/index.php/OCC/index/  (this is a link to Operation Christmas Child, which is one of the many things they do and something I enjoy every year since you can give a gift rather than just money); http://www.metroministries.org/index.php (donations go to helping inner-city children with school supplies, food, and keeping them off the street, teaching them to live for Jesus instead.  I know someone who knows the founder personally, and can verify that every penny will go to rescuing the children from lives of prostitution, violence, and gangs); http://www.ceitci.org/about/changing-a-generation (I use to work for Ceitci personally, and with her organization spanning from Bulgaria, Ghana, and Uganda, she helps with Child prostitution, the Child-soldiers of Uganda, building wells in Africa, providing for the outcast young ones in Bulgaria)

The list goes on; the acts of compassion go as far as your imagination can take them.  The key is, to follow your passions.  What are you passionate about?  Use that to give to others!  Maybe you're passionate about music, so play at nursing homes.  Like me, you could be passionate about writing, so write about this and write for the hurting (that's what I'm doing with my book); don't just write, DO SOMETHING though.  If you're passionate about children, tutor them or join Big-Brother, Big-Sister.  The point is, God put a passion in your heart to work out in compassion for others!

BEING THE BARRIER TOGETHER

If we all allow our hearts to become vibrant and alive in compassion as a church, imagine what would happen!  In sticking with the coral metaphor, think of the Great Barrier Reef.  Alone, coral does not make much of a change, but interlaced together like this Reef, it changes the entire environment of the massive ocean around it.  Not only does it create a barrier from the overpowering waves and alter the tides, but it is a harbor and safe place for all the creatures of the sea.  AND, it takes your breath away!  The American church operating in compassion together can change the tides of the sea which is moving towards selfishness.  It can hold back or repair the damage of the waves to so many lives.  It can be a safe haven for those who need a place to belong.  And, when we become this, we WILL take the breath of the world away, for it will allow God's beauty to be displayed in, through and around us!  We were meant to be a living, moving, colorful community that stops others in their tracks and causes them to ask, "How can I be a part of THAT?"  

SO, START BY JUST DOING SOMETHING!  

Hoping Afraid

Hope or Fear?
Fear or Hope?

I have a choice, but the choice isn't as easy as it seems.  The decision doesn't just come down to choosing to have fear, or choosing to have hope, but the fear is wrapped up in choosing hope.

What if I'm disappointed?
What if I get my hopes up, I begin to care again, only to have them dashed?
What if I'm hoping for the impossible?

So I fear hope, because although it's a beautiful thing, it can HURT!  My mind shouts at me, "RUN before you care, RUN before it gets hard, RUN before you get disappointed.  But I don't have a reason to run other than fear..."

You see, yesterday, I decided to choose hope in the face of fear once more.  I'm still desperately afraid!  And yet, I'm no longer living by fear, because with this choice I choose to hope in spite of the fear; I choose not to live numb or broken in order to avoid disappointment.  God has given me so many dreams and visions for the future, and a two months ago I was living in this spot of just...existing.  I was not seeing how any of the dreams or visions would come to past, or evidence of them, so I just shut down.  Tired of always hoping and feeling that disappointment.  But, living pushing aside hope, living giving into fears of not reaching what you hope for, that is no life at all.  The scriptures say "hope deferred makes the heart sick" (Proverbs 13:12).   I can attest to that, for when I push aside hoping, my spirit feels weak and frail.  That zest that normally accompanies my every  move is zapped.  But living by hope, and refusing to give into the evidence of what's seen, brings LIFE back and I'm able to fully LOVE again.

Two months ago, I was living with a crazy fear of trying to finish my book.  I kept hearing the fear speaking to me, "What if you can't do it? what if you don't have enough inside of you to make it complete?  What if it's no good?"  Yet, HOPE was saying, "What if you DO have it inside?  What if it's just waiting to come out?"  And so, I wrote anyway.  Every time I sat down at the keyboard, I was afraid!  Well, I finished my book!  Turns out, fear lied.  And it's lying again, because now it's saying, "What if you can't edit your book into a presentable project?  What if no one wants to read it?  What if you never get published?"  Fear also keeps telling me I will never be married or have a family; that I will always do everything alone and no one will choose me.  Fear tells me, "You have no friends.  No one really cares!  What's the use of opening up to them."  So, everything that's inside of me wants to RUN, as I said before, shut down, shut out.

AND YET....I know from before, I have to hope afraid.  I have to choose to write anyways, to love anyways, to open up and let others in anyways.  Because regardless of what happens, hoping is a form of trust in God.  It tells Him, I believe you love me, and I'll lean on that love.  In regards to fear, Jesus says, "Do not be afraid, I am here" (John 6:19-20) "Don't be afraid; just believe" (Mark 5:36), and "there is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear..." (1 John 4:18).  I've always loved that last verse, and God gave me a revelation about it just this morning.  The "I AM" (i.e. Jesus) is love, and we are not to be afraid because I AM is here.  When Jesus says, I AM, it means He is the first and the last, the beginning and the end.  So His love and touch extends from the beginning of our life until the end.  We have no need to fear, but only to hope, for we can trust that He who LOVES us has our future taken care of as well as our past.  He knows, and that's what matters.

Fear would have us forget this.  Fear would have us disregard the reality that GOD LOVES US and HAS A PLAN FOR US.  Fear would have us run.  Pastor Ivan Tait points out, "check yourself:  the thing you're afraid of may be the very thing that's your destiny."

My destiny is in writing; my heart was made to love; my life was created to GIVE...and these are all things I do afraid because I must choose HOPE!  Hope in the fact that God loves me and will work all things out for good, as He promises, makes me write each word and check my heart before Him everyday.

Today, check your heart!  What are you afraid of doing?  If you feel God pushing you towards it, don't run!  Embrace it, do it afraid!  Join me each morning in choosing to refuse the stagnation and lethargy of deferred hope and decide to live the DANGEROUS life of hoping instead!

Yes, hope is dangerous...not hoping is fatal - it's DEATH for our heart and soul!

You may be afraid of hoping, but, instead, choose to live hoping while afraid!  Eventually, the fear dissipates in the reality that Jesus' love goes before, behind, and around us;  we are set free to let our hope soar with the reality that He brings "good" out of all things entrusted to Him...even when it seems impossible.

Elopement of the Morning

Mornings are precious!  They promise a brand new day with fresh start and hope for what may come.  Jesus is teaching me to let my times with Him be the same.  To let Him take me away and resurrect my hope, to restore my heart, and renew my ability to love again.  He wants to pierce through every dark place within us and bring LIFE.  He wants to sweep us away so that we join Him in a dance, where we must trust and follow.  But, like any dance, it's full of excitement and movement which causes the heart to sing!

The One who loves you more than anyone or anything else is calling you away;  He's calling you to a place where He can bring fresh life and a new dawn upon your dreams and heart.  YOU ARE HIS...will you allow Him to be YOURS, your all-and-all, your first love?

ELOPEMENT OF THE MORNING, Poem

 Morning bright –

dreams in sight,

as I awake in light,

golden piercing the night.

In the dawning of hope,

Love of my soul and I elope.

Running away to a quiet place,

away from this world’s-race,

into our meeting space –

 in this meadow we sit face to face.

Beside us, a stream trickles,

the daisies and grass underneath tickle.

We watch our sanctuary come to life,

this hope slicing my loneliness like a knife.

Even in our silence my Beloved speaks to me

to renew dreams and visions of all that is to be.

In the light of the Son, He reaches down,

pulls me up off the ground,

and whisks me through the fields –

twirling me around and around He wheels.

In this dance,

swept in the arms of this Romance,

the brokenness healed;

dreams unconcealed;

life brought back to the heart

to beat a love that felt would never again start.

In our meadow

I let go…

My Love sweeps me back

to my room where, finishing, is my worship track.

But I can’t stop dancing every day,

for He spun my doubt away.

I am alone never,

for my Love beckons forever,

in each dawn’s emerging,

to enter the meadow, our dances again converging.

© by: Krinda Joy, July 24^th, 2011

                   “My beloved is mine, and I am His.” Song of Songs 2:16

Written in the Sands

I watch the ocean waves crash upon the sand.

                     I feel the granules shift between my toes.

                               I run a handful of the white, powdery sands through my fingers...

just trying to imagine with each one thoughts of love from above,

"You are precious."

"I died for you."

"You are worth it."

"I have great plans for you."

"I call you daughter, and Princess."

"You have a purpose."

After my handful returns to the mass of particles on the beach, I look around in awe.  Spread before me is an example of how much God thinks of me, how much He loves me - and the amount is unfathomable, unimaginable, innumerable!  Psalms :17-18 says,

"How precious [towards] me are your thoughts, O God!  How vast the sum of them!  Were I to count them, they would outnumber the grains of sand." 

I see why the psalmist here has to use TWO exclamation marks.  This to me is one of the most profound statements of God's care for us in the Bible.  Think about it - if each grain of sand represents a thought God has about us, then that means He thinks of us each moment of infinity, because we cannot even count a handful of sand!  We know this right?   But I have to ask, do we really know??? We know He died for us, we know He loves us...but do we really know that He is consumed - passionately and unabashedly - with a love and attention to us.  HE DESIRES US.  Every moment of every day He thinks about us; He eagerly waits for the time when we finally spend time with Him.  In these times when we can finally begin hearing His whispering of those thoughts of love, "You are precious. You are worth it. I died for you.  I have great plans for you..."

Yet, I think so often I focus on the waves crashing upon these sands of love instead.   I look at the power that the waters, representing hardships, holds to wash away the sands.  I have this visual that God's love is written in one part of the mass, and when the ocean washes over the love, that it sweeps away God's care.  And, I can no longer feel Him speaking His thoughts to me;  I feel as if He's gone silent.  As if perhaps He isn't thinking of me.  I hear the roar of the ocean instead of the whispers coming from the granules. And I watch the waves pound over and over again, overtaking all feelings of security in God's love for me, and doubt settles in.  But then, I hear God telling me, "Krinda, Look at the sands!" 

I look....  

and all I see is that the writing of LOVE has been erased by the ocean of turmoil and mistakes. 
But God says again, "Krinda, LOOK AT THE SANDS." 
So, I pick up that handful again, I look at the sands there, and I hear God urging, "Look!  On each grain I've written my love!" 

No matter what, this life cannot take away God's love because when hardships seem to sweep away the thoughts God has for us, it's really an illusion.  The waves seem so powerful, yet they can never demolish the sands...they can never flood away God's love because regardless of the push and pull of the ocean, the sands still remain with the writing of God's love upon each granule. 

 "...the seas have lifted up their pounding waves. Mightier than the thunder of the great waters,      mightier than the breakers of the sea - the Lord on high is mighty."  Psalm 93:3,4

No matter how mighty your struggle seems to be; no matter how powerful your temptation or sin may appear, GOD IS GREATER!  Even when the words of God's love feel wiped away by the surge of pain, know that this reality remains - God's love can never, ever, ever be overpowered! Satan will try and pound out this love and make it disappear by forcing it under the water, pushing aside, or flinging it about, , but no matter what he does, God's love continues to be endless, infinite, innumerable.  For, even these seas must surrender to the mightiness and vastness of God eventually (Psalm 89:9), and nothing, I repeat nothing, can separate us from Him because even in the midst of the pounding waves what is underneath us, and swirling all around us is...SAND (i.e. LOVE).  We cannot escape it.  We cannot be separated it.  It rest under, along, and between the oceans of this world....

                               God's amazing love for you is written in the mere existence of the sands.

Next time you go to the beach, run your hand through the grains beneath your feet.  Lay upon the sand and just image, you rest upon an infinity of loving thoughts from God above; you are cushioned by soft whispers....

"You are precious."

"I died for you."

"You are worth it."

"I have great plans for you."

"I call you daughter, and Princess."

"You have a purpose."